The Present

Today I was given the gift of another day. 

I have decided to place my focus on the here and now. 

I will of course keep an eye on my recovery. Inspired by more of Josh's weekly visits, and the continued reviews of the book, "A PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE ". This life we lead, so full of our labors and aspirations, yet we all end up in the same place, win or lose. Prince or pauper. A dark hole, is in everyone's future. Whether or not that is all there is, seems to be where the debate lies. Many have faith, in a life after death, as do I. 

For me right now, more than ever. I have more time than most, to think about what that might look like. During a recent excursion to the world wide web, I came upon a saying, to which I took a particular liking to. It follows and it describes my outlook on life these days: 

Yesterday is history, tomorrow's a mystery 

Today is a gift, that is why it is called the present. 

Author Unknown 

More and more, I find solace in the hours spent sleeping.

Where I can dream a reality that is quite different than that of my waking hours.

Perhaps it is a glimpse into our true selves. Even still, a glimpse into what we call Heaven. I know for me, it is an alternate space and time. A place where I can run and jump. Where none of the effects of my current condition, or indeed, no limitation of any mortal being binds me. The possibilities are infinite. Fantasies can be my reality. 

Much of what I dream, remains a mystery to me. Most often it wake, without any memory of where my dreams have taken me. Maybe that is because I do not dream on those nights. But some dreams stay with me. I can still recall dreams from when I was a child. Not as vividly. My journey of the past year has been one of a larvae to a caterpiller. What lies ahead for me is the great metamorphosis. 

My final transformation into the Butterfly I was meant to be. The most difficult thing is excepting the change. For change is bound to bring on a period of what feels like pain. 

When in reality, it's a fear of the difference about to occur. I do not fear death. Which is not to say that I've given up. If I'm meant to continue on as a caterpillar, I'll meet the challenges it throws at me head on. If it is time to become a butterfly, I will do so with the only regrets, of leaving behind the many who have been key to helping me define love. I'll anxiously await for them all to receive their own wings. 

Until then, you can bet, I will explore the winds and wherever they might blow.

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