Sliming Down and Vegging Out

I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But it's now been 10 months since my stroke. And although I probably have lost nearly 25 pounds. And have been on a Vegan liquid diet the entire time. 

I still have my gut and thighs. So I don't know what kind of diet you are on, but unless it includes some form of exercise, chances are you are not going to lose the weight where you want to. 

10 months and I look like the poster child for some Ethiopian refugee fund! It's really rather disheartening, you would have thought that after all this time, I would be rocking a slim senior body, rather than some Dale Gribble look alike from King of the Hill. 

My children have already started it calling me bird legs, when my legs used to be something I would get compliments on. I hope my Vegan lifestyle, doesn't lead to any more weight loss. Next thing you know, people are not going to start suspecting me of being a crackhead! 

Even in our later years, there is a certain amount of vanity that we hold onto. Even though I don't ever leave this bed, I still bathe, keep my nails trimmed, brush my hair, and trim and comb my goatee. I do those things because they keep me feeling human. It's even done to us after we die! Society places such a premium on our looks, that we get one last makeover before we are lowered into the ground for our final dirt nap!

As much as I don't want to admit it, I have taken to watching more television than I should. Every weekday morning, on the Quest network, I have been watching Pawn Kings and Auction Kings. 

Pawn Kings is like the Jerry Springer of Pawn shows. Set in Detroit, it is a show that displays both the greed and desperation that mankind is capable of. All the sweat and toil are represented in the various offerings for which they take pennies on the dollar. And the robber barons laugh to the bank. You know that like Friday night wrestling, it all is staged, just to entertain you. And even though you catch yourself, pointing out the things which would never happen were this real, you can't seem to turn away from the drama, regardless of how surreal. 

Auction Kings is a show that displays rich people who bid against each other, for the right to display their wealth to their friends. Seldom is it an item they can even use, but rather something they will hang on a wall or place on their coffee table. A reminder to all who gaze upon it, or even themselves, that they have so much money, they can spend it on things that display that wealth. Kind of like putting a stack of $100 bills on your coffee table, or nailing them to your wall, or at least as pretentious. 

It really is a complete waste of time. It is for adults, what Saturday morning cartoons are for little kids. Who am I trying to fool? If I could still eat cereal, you know where you would find me on a Saturday. Some things don't ever change. Only now my pajamas are a little bigger!

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